March 17, 2010
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
Tiger’s coming back! Let the media frenzy begin. Now we get to hear everybody’s (and I mean everybody’s) opinion all over again. It’ll be fun to see the paparazzi vs. the old curmudgeons that run the Masters. I’ll put my money on the old guys. They’ll keep a lid on things inside the grounds but outside promises to be a real zoo. We’ll see if this tiger can make the adjustment.
The media just loves when it plasters
The airwaves with Tiger’s disasters.
They’ll gear up again
‘Cause now we know ‘when’,
He’ll come back to play in the Masters.
March 5, 2010
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
Looks like the ‘purge’ has started in Russia following their dismal showing in Vancouver. The head of their Olympic Committee has resigned. I was noticing when I was watching how few times they were in the mix. They’re usually very big at the winter games especially in skating and Hockey. I think the Hockey loss to Canada was particularly galling. Canada, with their record take in gold medals, has raised the bar for host country performance. Russia will host in 2012.
While Russia is able to boast
Sports prowess that’s better than most,
Vancouver fell flat
So there’s no standing pat,
As the next time it’s their turn to host.
March 3, 2010
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
I miss the Olympics already…although every time I tried to watch I just got disgusted with NBC. I’ll leave that alone for now. The Olympics are a singular international event that brings people together from all over the world. If we could solve our political problems with sporting games we’d all be a lot better off. The Winter games are not quite as popular given that many countries don’t have winter but the feeling of camaraderie and shared experience is still there. And in the end…a gold medal is still a gold medal. Kudos to the Canadians for putting on a spectacular event!
The Winter Olympics have past
And for some it was glory at last.
While others saw pain
All stood to gain,
From the drama that plays unsurpassed.
The Winter games show us concisely
The things that you must do precisely,
To take home the gold.
But the best to behold
Is what happens when all can play nicely.
March 1, 2010
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
Now here’s a good idea for Tiger Woods…offer to host Saturday Night Live! This would go a long way towards showing us the real Tiger instead of the PR image Tiger. Let’s face it, the PR image Tiger is long gone and never to return so he’s got nothing to lose. Plus, if you can laugh at yourself, the whole world laughs with you.
This remedy for Tiger will tell
If his humor’s in rehab as well.
Screw the PR
And come as you are
To guest host a new SNL.
February 26, 2010
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
Here’s group who want to make ‘pole’ dancing an Olympic sport. I’m not sure exactly where the skill comes into play but who am I to judge. That, in fact, is a concern of current pole dancers. They fear you might attract gymnasts, circus performers or Chinese acrobats and lose the sensual aspect of the dance. I don’t think this will get very far. We usually like to keep our sex and sports separated…except for the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue.
There’s a group who have a new goal
For their dancing, an Olympic role.
But fathers aren’t sold
As they’ve always been told
To be keeping their girls ‘off the pole’.
Lindsay Vonn
February 16, 2010
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
Canada finally wins gold at their home Olympics. They kept making a big deal at this even though Canada has won many Olympic golds, just not at the Olympics they’ve hosted. Okay…it’s done. Good excuse for a big party. Now the other atheletes can relax a bit and we may even see more Canadian gold as the pressure comes off. Alexandre Bilodeau is the new hero and it couldn’t have happen to a nicer guy. Congratulations Alexandre!
Up amidst the fog and the cold
An Olympian’s story is told.
Thru moguls and air
And a brother to share,
Canada finally gets gold!
February 8, 2010
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
What a great Super Bowl game! It went down to the wire and was anybody’s game until that last interception and score by the Saints. It’s not like Payton Manning to make that kind of mistake (more like Brett Farve) but it just goes to show…anything can happen. Congratulations to the New Orleans Saints.
The Colts had their chances to score
But New Orleans came through with one more.
When the final gun sounded
The world was astounded,
The Saints aren’t the ain’ts anymore.
February 4, 2010
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
The World Anti-Doping Agency has marijuana on it’s list of banned ‘performance enhancing’ substances. That’s a description I never considered. The only performance improvement I ever saw was an increased ability to consume all manner of snack foods. Unless this is a new Olympic sport, I think someone’s blowing smoke.
In watching discussions unfold
Marijuana it seems is remold,
From spaced-out entrancing
To performance enhancing,
It still leaves the judges stone-cold.
January 26, 2010
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
It’s cinderella time for the New Orleans Saints. Enjoy the party! I remember the first time my Denver Broncos went to the Superbowl after years and years of losing seasons. You feel a rush of excitement and a sense of relief all at the same time. We’ve joined the club…we’ve arrived. Of course we lost the Superbowl to Dallas who had been there many times before but no matter. The Broncos went on to keep winning and finally got that first Superbowl victory. We won’t know how this one plays out for another two weeks but either way, the New Orleans Saints have crossed a threshold. Savor the moment. I wish them the best of luck…they’re gonna need it!
New Orleans came away with a win
As poor Brett took it hard on the chin.
With a Super Bowl coming
The fans will be humming
“When the Saints Go (at last) Marching In’.
January 14, 2010
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
The latest interview with Mark McGwire, the baseball slugger, was filled with tears and remorse…several years after he denied any wrong doing. The most disturbing part, however, was his lack of acknowledgment about the steroids impact on his performance. He credited a ‘higher power’. He was high alright (or ‘juiced’ as they say). Either way, his accomplishments are forever tarnished. He may still be in denial but the rest of us are under no such delusions.
It was tough to listen to McGwire
Whose drug use showed him a liar.
With his records on trial
He’s still in denial
And his claim to fame stuck in the mire.
December 9, 2009
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
This is my last post about Tiger…I promise. It’s just that his antics get more bizarre every day and the limericks just flow forth (you can find more limericks about Tiger over at my golf limerick site). It will be real interesting to see how the fans treat him when he plays again. Some writers take issue with the amount of coverage this story is generating but it’s not unusual. People are intrigued when a famous figure is felled by a women…or two…or three…or four…okay nine! (at last count). The sad part is, it was all so avoidable.
On the course, he’s in total command
But at night he’s a slave to his gland.
Instead of a thrust
To fulfill his lust,
He could have just lent it a hand.
December 4, 2009
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
The World Cup officially kicks off today with the team draws into the eight groups. I’m not usually a soccer fan (football for the rest of the world) but the World Cup is special. Held every four years with country vs. country makes for a very exciting tournament. During the team draw, you don’t want to get placed into the ‘Group of Death’. It’s hard to pin down exactly what this is but suffice to say…it’s not good.
With drama straight out of MacBeth
The fans will hold onto their breath.
The World Cup draw
Will deal the short straw
To the teams in the famed ‘Group of Death’.
December 3, 2009
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
Didn’t I just say Tiger was golden? Turns out he’s just gold ‘flake’. How did he ever expect to get away with anything when everybody knows who he is? And the girls he was dallying with? What did he think they’d do when the tabloids offered them a big payday? Turns out he wasn’t the only one who could make ‘em squeal.
A good swing, Tiger ends with a twirl,
A good swinger, Tiger takes for a whirl.
But when chased with a club
He runs like a schlub.
Luckily, Elin swings like a girl.
December 1, 2009
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
I would like to see the replay of that golf swing Elin Woods used to free Tiger. Was her form well balanced with a full follow through? I read it took multiple swings with two clubs. Do they all count as strokes or does she get a mulligan? Enquiring minds what to know! Into every life a little rain must fall but Tiger’s still golden.
It was Elin who rushed out to save
Poor Tiger who had a close shave.
A hard swung seven
Was a gift from heaven.
She’s glad of the lessons he gave.
November 16, 2009
Filed under: Sports — @ 3:00 am
There is a golf course that lies right on the border between North and South Korea, right next to the DMZ (demilitarized zone). It only has one hole but it’s a monster. A snap hook to the left may end with a ka-boom as it lands in a mine field. It acts as a little ’slice of life’ for the soldiers stationed at this lonely outpost. Did I forget to mention the Korean tigers and vampire deer? It sounds like one of those crazy golf holes you see on calendars…except this one is real.
The course is between both Koreas
And to play it is no panacea
For the boredom and stress.
Still…the soldiers attest
‘Hats off’ to one crazy idea.
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