Cool Limerick Poems » Events

China Shows World It’s Blind Spot

Wed, 02 May 2012 10:00:09 +0000

Here’s a great story about a Chinese activist who escaped his house arrest and took refuge in the U.S. Embassy. Chen Guangcheng’s crime was exposing forced abortions in China. Unfortunately, Chinese authorities will punish his relatives because that’s what they do. Despite all the rhetoric about the Chinese economic miracle, they are still a repressive regime of thugs. Which makes it all the better to watch them squirm because…

The Chinese were caught in a bind
When their prisoner managed to find
A way to escape
That left them agape
‘Cause it turns out he’s legally blind.

The Horrors Of Paying Rent

Sat, 14 Apr 2012 10:00:36 +0000

Here’s a story about a family who moved into a new house only to find that it’s haunted. Needless to say, the landlord was unconvinced and refused to return any of their monies. The most unusual part to this story (other than it’s ALL unusual) is that it took place in Toms River, New Jersey…the sight of the filming of the Amityville Horror movie. Perhaps the ghosts had a contract dispute?

Strange happenings caused them lament
So they moved out to much discontent,
But was the house haunted
Or had they just wanted
To skip out on paying the rent?

Another Black Eye for Apple

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 10:00:55 +0000

I continue to ask why people do business with Apple. They are hell-bent to extract as much money from your pocket as they possibly can…legal or otherwise. The Justice department has now formally accused Apple of price-fixing with several major book publishers. Is it a wonder why there is so much content pirating? These greedy publishers deserve to go the way of the dinosaur and are only delaying the inevitable. As for Apple…

At Apple, the price of e-books
Is not quite as fair as it looks.
Now accused of collusion
The only conclusion
Is behavior more related to crooks.

Jet Blue Has A Special Effect On Employees

Wed, 28 Mar 2012 12:54:32 +0000

Here is a scary story. A pilot for Jet Blue started acting erratic in the cockpit, flipping switches and otherwise ‘flipping out’. The co-pilot had the presence of mind to get him out of the cockpit and locked the door behind him. He eventually had to be subdued by passengers until the plane could make an emergency landing. It reminds me of the story a year ago about the Jet Blue flight attendant that quit his job in a flourish by grabbing a beer and jumping down the emergency slide. The company seems to have a real affect on it’s employees…and not in a good way.

There are somethings in life you can do
That you might not do again if you knew,
Like flying on jets
If all that it gets
Is a company job with Jet Blue.

Afghanistan is Done

Mon, 27 Feb 2012 11:00:01 +0000

Afghanistan deserves to be a shit-hole. Thousands of years of civilization and the best they can do is riot in the streets because someone burned their ‘holy’ book. They’re irrational, ignorant, corrupt and not worth the blood of our soldiers. They have no industry, no economy (other than growing poppy), no brains and no will. It’s safe to assume that if this is the best they can aspire to after two centuries of civilization, then they’re destined be a shit-hole forever. They deserve nothing because they’ve earned nothing. We need to get out yesterday.

Religion is often just mean
And mixed with a crowd can careen
So out of control
To cause a death toll,
Even God must think it’s obscene.

The Most Unlucky Man In The World

Fri, 17 Feb 2012 11:00:25 +0000

Here’s a guy who just had a very bad day. He accidentally flew his small plane into the airspace where President Obama was being ferried to Air Force One. He didn’t realize his mistake until two F16′s appeared outside his window. Once on the ground, they found over 40 pounds of Pot on his plane! The absolute wrong place at exactly the wrong time.

He flew in a space he ought not
And imagine just what he had thought
When he found he’s between
Two F16′s
And carrying a plane load of pot.

How Not To Get A Monkey Off Your Back

Thu, 05 Jan 2012 13:24:59 +0000

Banana-Sam, the missing squirrel monkey, has been returned to the San Francisco zoo. He was kidnapped? two nights ago and a reward was posted for his return. A man walked into the police station and told officers he spotted the monkey in a park and managed to coax it into his backpack. Unfortunately, the zoo’s assistant curator of primates says that’s “not likely”. Squirrel monkeys are skittish and not the type to willingly hop into a backpack. The police also thought the story sounded a little suspicious so no reward money has been given out. The man who found him may have turned in one monkey, but now has another monkey on his back.

Banana Sam was a little to spunky
And the story a little to funky
So instead of an ending
The reward is still pending
As the business of capture sounds monkey.

The War In Iraq: A Sad Piece Of American History

Fri, 16 Dec 2011 11:00:34 +0000

The War in Iraq has officially been ended…whatever that means. We still have troops, bases and commitments that will continue to drain our resources and treasury. This war can only be described as an unmitigated disaster…or in the words of Clint Eastwood…a gigantic clusterfuck! The lies, the arrogance, the stupidity of the American people to re-elect George Bush all make this one of the lowest points in American history. It continues to amaze me when looking around the world or back through history, how small groups of evil, misguided or ignorant people can cause so much death, damage and destruction. We still have a long way to go.

Though the war in Iraq has now ended
Those responsible still are defended.
With waste on a scale
That colors us pale
It’s left scars that will never be mended.

Will The Occupy Protest Head To Florida?

Sat, 12 Nov 2011 11:00:47 +0000

The Occupy protest seems to be losing some support especially here on the west coast. Their nebulous demands don’t lend themselves to a quick solution, or for that matter, any solution at all. While they may be a part of the 99%, they can’t claim to represent a group that large and diverse. Regardless, their momentum now will mostly be determined by whether then can weather the weather.

Though I can’t tell which way the winds blowing
The Occupy protest is growing,
But despite what’s been said
There’s trouble ahead
When winter comes and it starts snowing.

Terrorists Are Lightweights, China Is The Real Threat

Fri, 04 Nov 2011 10:00:50 +0000

I get frustrated with our overt fear of terrorist attacks. All they’ve ever been able to do is sneak up every ten years and blow up a building or two. Now I don’t like to see that happen and the 9/11 attacks were a tragedy, but terrorists will never, I repeat never, threaten the stability or integrity of our country. They’re just small groups of zealots who will always be around and we just have to deal with it. The real threat is China!

They have the capability and desire to do significantly more damage to our country. It’s currently being played out in cyberspace so it’s mostly invisible and the human cost is negligible, but we shouldn’t be lulled into complacency. They know the best way to damage our country is from within. In the future, a Chinese virus might be more deadly than an American bomb.

The source of our countries unease
Is a fear of Islamic draftees,
But a much bigger threat
Sneaks in on the Net
As a hacker who’s speaking Chinese.