Here are some new Christmas limericks. The last one is my favorite.
The crowd at the mall raised the bar
As the biggest this Christmas by far.
But would you believe
As I started to leave
I’d forgotten where I parked the car!
I pretended to not hear her beckon
But it bought me no more than a second
Before more haranguing
To get the lights hanging
Or it’s coal in my stocking, I’ll reckon.
Most Christians are quite unaware
That the end of December is where
The age-old tradition
Is solstice transition,
So Jesus will just have to share.
While Santa’s preparing his sleigh
For the work it must do Christmas day,
The reindeer’s foreboding
Is not what they’re loading
But Santa’s third breakfast buffet.